Author: Dan Blank

Today I want to share a small case study with you, illustrating how word-of-mouth marketing really happens. My goal is to encourage you to connect in meaningful ways with others who resonate with the writing and creative work you are passionate about. Okay, let’s dig in…

OMG! My Book Was Mentioned on a Podcast!

Last week I received an email letting me know that me and my book, Be the Gateway, were mentioned on the #AmWriting podcast.

Eeeeeeeeeeee! (that is what I thought when I found out.) This was me:

The #amwriting podcast is incredible for so many reason:

• Each episode is so wonderful in how helpful it is, tackling big difficult tasks in this super down to earth and friendly way.
• The two hosts are just awesome: KJ Dell’Antonia, who is a columnist and contributing editor for the New York Times’ Well Family, and Jessica Lahey, who writes the Parent-Teacher Conference column for the New York Times’ Well Family and is the author of The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Children Can Succeed.
• Their audience are exactly the people who would appreciate the message of Be the Gateway.

So you can see why I was so excited to be mentioned on the podcast.

The Timeline

Okay, let’s break it down step-by-step how this happened. It feels like this is the opening scene:

… because the reality is, word-of-mouth marketing often feels like a movie such as Pulp Fiction:

• You can’t tell which part happened first.
• You can’t tell what action led to which reaction, or which unintended consequence.
• There are so many characters that you don’t realize are interrelated in some ways.
• You realize how easy it is to end up like Vincent Vega in the shower instead of Jules Winnfield taking his wallet back.

Okay, this is what happened, this is what word-of-mouth marketing looks like:

1. Kathleen Fordyce signed up to my email newsletter a few years ago. She tells me, “I have been receiving your newsletter for years and always found it helpful.” I point this out because it underscores an action I took, to keep sending out an email every single week, but also an action she took: she did not click the “unsubscribe” button dozens and dozens of times. She could have. She didn’t.
2. Kathleen listens to the #amwriting podcast, and heard KJ mention that she is finishing a book, and was considering how to grow her community. Kathleen emailed her recommending my newsletter, since that is a topic I focus on often.
3. KJ signed up for my email newsletter! Yay!
4. When someone signs up for my newsletter, an email is automatically sent out that asks, “What is your biggest challenge?” I read and respond to every single one of these — it is such a wonderful opportunity for me to learn about and connect with someone who is interested in my newsletter. KJ took the time to respond to this, which I want to call out because she is busy! I mean, all of you are busy. I never take this for granted, the time and energy it takes to reply to that email.
5. When I received her response, I noticed her name right away. I became aware of KJ awhile back when I was doing research for a client who is an author writing about education and family. I replied back to her response, told her how much I appreciated her checking out my newsletter, then asked her a question of how I can help her with her immediate challenges in growing her community.
6. We had a nice back and forth conversation via email exploring all of this.
7. I suppose she heard about my book via one of the email newsletters I sent, and she bought it and read it.
8. Then on May 5th she mentioned me twice on the podcast, and she mentioned that she liked Be the Gateway.
9. Kathleen emailed me to let me know, and then we had a nice email exchange back and forth. And more importantly, I now follow her on Instagram, where she shared one of my new favorite quotes:
   “You can do it!” -Coffee.

10. I emailed KJ to thank her and tell her I appreciated the mention on her podcast. I also asked if I can interview her for research I am doing for my next book.

When I consider these steps, they at once seem very simple and very complex. Simple because the main driver here was empathy, focus, and simple communication. It was Kathleen and KJ and me just trying to help each other and connect in a meaningful way. This is not unlike how word-of-mouth marketing would have happened in the 1920s, the 1950s, or the 1980s.

It feels complex because it isn’t a simple system that has a clear pre-planned result.

What You Can Learn From This

I think there is a lot that one can learn from this:

• The long-game works. Just showing up, posting a blog and newsletter each week. Responding to emails. Asking questions. Connecting one by one with wonderful people.

  During that time, the years that Kathleen received my newsletter, there were so many moments of writing them on weeks where I felt too busy to find the time for it. Or where clicking “send” on the newsletter gave me sweaty palms because I didn’t know if the post would resonate or fall flat.

• Mentioning your work, works. When Be the Gateway came out, I told everyone I know. That wasn’t always easy, because no one wants to feel that they are being self-promotional, and they certainly don’t want to feel they are spamming people. But without me doing that, KJ never would have known about it.
• Direct outreach works. It is just amazing that Kathleen reached out to KJ, that Kathleen reached out to me, and that KJ replied to my emails. If you feel like you don’t know anyone who would resonate with your creative work, or who is a like-mind, try reaching out. Does it feel risky? Yep. Is it risky? Nope.
• You have to keep engaging. As all of this was happening in the past week, I was thinking: “How can I thank them?” “What can I learn from this and share with others?” “How can they fit into research I’m doing for my book?”

  It’s scary to keep engaging sometimes because you don’t want to risk rejection. Even before I wrote this post, I emailed KJ and Kathleen asking permission to do so. Between the time I sent the note and the time they replied, I was nervous. What if they feel they did me a favor, and now I’m asking something ELSE of them, messing up any goodwill that we had. Luckily, they felt sent lovely responses, and were totally into the idea.

Too often, we think that the sale of a book happens in one step. That you do something on social media and it leads directly to the sale of your book. I have heard versions of this a thousand times from an author or someone marketing their creative work, “I checked my Facebook ads, and they didn’t convert to a book sale. What a waste.”

But real sales happen with a weird process of consideration, abandonment, re-consideration, working across networks, little reminders, and finally, a sale. When I buy a book, it is often after I have heard about it a few times. After I checked it on Amazon three times on three different days. After I put it in my shopping cart, then got distracted, only returning to it fifteen days later.

All of this was underscored in an email conversation I had with Kathleen this week:

“In the past, I honestly might not have sent KJ that initial email. Two years ago, I attended the ASJA (American Society of Journalists and Authors) conference in NYC. I was blown away by how friendly, forthcoming and honest the writers there were – both in their presentations, panels and how willing they were to answer any questions or to simply share their experiences.”

“I realized two things: I missed the camaraderie and connection with people who are passionate about writing. And I noticed that the same people who were on one panel would be sitting next to me in the next talk, taking notes furiously. I realized even though their careers were way ahead of mine, they still were trying to learn, had questions or were trying to branch out their careers to try something new.”

“Fast forward: now I connect regularly (just by email or sometimes phone and Skype) with other writers. I seek that connection and make an effort – even if just a small one – to include that as part of my life and work.”

“I was in a mastermind for a while and do think people underestimate the power of collaboration. Not necessarily working together, but having people you can turn to – to bounce ideas off of, get feedback and to simply share the process with.”

“There are several writers that have welcomed me into their tribe and been so generous with their time and insight, I look at this as paying it forward. Because I simply want to live in a world where this sort of helpful supportive network exist, even among strangers.”

Thank you to Kathleen and KJ for their incredible generosity. Please consider checking out their work:

KJ: website, podcast, Instagram, Twitter
Kathleen: website, Facebook, Instagram.

Oh! And check out Jessica Lahey who runs the #amwriting podcast with KJ, she is the author of The Gift of Failure: website, Twitter, Instagram

Thanks!
-Dan

Today I want to talk about how to prioritize working on your craft vs. developing your platform: when to do it, how to manage it, and what steps I recommend you take first.

Two authors reached out to me recently sharing their biggest challenges:

• Anne-Marie asked: “My biggest challenge is to prioritize my time. How to manage all that needs to be done? What else should I be doing? Who to connect with?”
• George asked it this way: “I am new to creative writing. Is there an interim step – for example, start writing and publishing creative content on elements of the concept or do I plow forward with a draft of the novel? For example, I thought about writing a blog. Or do I continue my research and stay heads down until I have a draft and then request feedback?”

To be clear up front: when I use the term “platform,” I simply mean your ability to connect in a meaningful way with people who would appreciate your creative work. It means having a sense of who may resonate with it, why, how to reach them, and ways of doing so that feel as though like minded people are connecting in ways that are positive.

Okay, let’s dig in.

Craft Always Comes First

I’ve seen plenty of blog posts and webinars promising to give you ways to craft a book in a weekend, edit it in a day, and publish it on Amazon the following Wednesday.

Bleh.

I believe in craft. In honing one’s skills, in slowly creating work that elevates the experience you create for your readers, or whoever discovers your creative work. I grew up as an artist, starting art school at age 5, and spending the first 25 years of my life in a string of (sometimes misguided) projects with drawing, painting, sculpture, photography, writing, cartoons, music and so much more.

In working with writers and creative professionals, every day of my life is spent interacting with people who are fueled by a drive to create. You wouldn’t be reading my newsletter or blog if that didn’t describe you as well.

Craft comes first. Period. Not only because it makes your work better, but because I believe that being an artist is about transforming yourself as a person. It is about pushing your own boundaries, asking hard questions, and being open to going where the answer takes you, even if it is sometimes someplace new, and perhaps, terrifying.

The art and the artist are intertwined, as it should be. Many “shortcuts” to make it “easier” or “quicker” comes at a price that diminishes the work, and limits the journey of the artist themselves.

You Can Skip “Platform” Entirely

There are two easy situations in which you can entirely skip even the slightest thought around developing a platform, of understanding who your ideal audience is and how to reach them. That’s right: forget about it entirely. They are:

• You create only for the self-satisfaction of creating. You create for yourself and no one else. You have zero aspirations of the work needing to connect with others. Now, I deeply believe in this. Back in 2011, I told the story of how I spent three years developing a series of pop up books, which now peacefully sit in my attic. I created them for me and no one else. Not everything you create needs to be shared. If you write music for yourself; craft stories for yourself; make art for yourself, I think that is wonderful. Keep creating.
• You are a creative genius. Your work is so good that it immediately resonates with others in a way that is almost shocking to them. It infects them, they can’t help but fall in love with it, to tell others about it. An aura surrounds you because you are just that good. No, you don’t need to have an ego about it, but wherever you go, you can’t help but notice that people are drawn to your creative work. It just happens, as if a force of nature. Go on, keep creating. The world needs more of what you do.

If either of these conditions apply to you, stop reading. You are entirely off the hook. Be the creative genius you are, and entirely let go of any pressure you feel about considering how to connect your work to your audience.

Balancing Craft and Platform

If you have any familiarity with my work, you likely already know that I believe that the work of “platform” has nothing to do with social media hacks, and everything to do with having empathy with those you feel will love the work you are creating. It is about forging meaningful connections with these individuals, and the communities in which they congregate.

I feel that you should start this work as soon as possible, long before you consider publishing.

Just as the craft of writing or other creative work takes time, so does the craft of understanding who your ideal audience is, what resonates with them, where to find them, how to connect with them, and how to infuse this in the “professional” side of being a “creative professional.”

You should hone your creative craft concurrently to considering how to develop an audience for it. No, you don’t have to write to an audience: There is a difference between knowing your audience and writing to one.

Knowing who your audience is shouldn’t change your work away from your core vision, but it can help you ensure that your stories reach an audience that cares.

Too many authors spend years on their creative craft, and mere weeks on understanding how to connect it to an audience. The result? Their work never connects to anyone.

I want to share my advice for how you can balance these two things — creative craft and understanding how your work can reach an audience — amidst your already busy life. Yes, I know you likely also have many other responsibilities that may include a day job, kids, relationships, attending to physical and mental health, and so much else.

In fact, this is what I have been working on in my mastermind group for the past month: how do we focus more on our individual creative visions, while also connecting it to an audience.

What they want is a transformation not just in their work, but in their identity. I asked the members of my mastermind about the transformation they have experienced in the past 30 days, and these are some of the replies:

“My transformation has been on two fronts. First, I’m feeling more confident about being a writer. Second, I’m actively working on my book with much more energy than before.”

“I feel I’ve shifted from the feeling that I was in a holding pattern into one of forward motion. [The Mastermind], has made me more confident about being a writer.”

“I feel a subtle shift (like a door slowly opening) in sharing my work. Writing the mission statement also helped me feel more grounded and validated.”

“It feels like I’m “settling into myself”. Makes it feel less like something that you can get wrong.”

“I have a tendency to fall into that scared little girl mode, and I am not that person any more. I am a strong (in will if not always in body), intuitive, creative, problem-solving woman and I’m really going to need all of that to deal with all the questions that are flying around me right now.”

“My biggest transformation is beginning to see my work as experiences I craft to help [others] make memorable shifts in their lives.”

“I was feeling so confused about my creative direction at the onset, and through the exercises Dan has led us in and insights you all have shared, things clicked back into place.”

My advice for you to experience the transformation in your craft and in developing your audience concurrently is to:

• Prioritize what matters to you. In my mastermind group, each person did an analysis of what matters most to them, and then crafted a personal mission statement based on this. This is the statement that you hang on your wall in big block letters — statement that focuses on the effect you want your work to have in the world. It is a gauntlet to be thrown down, and for you as the artist to live up to. The simple act of claiming your identity is a powerful one to double down on your creative vision.
• Get collaborators. The mastermind is collaborative by nature, so each of the members have already taken that step, and it is magical to watch a group of strangers become supporters and advocates for each other. In 30 days, it feels like a group of people who have each other’s backs.

  Find a mentor. Create your own mastermind group, even if it is just you and one other person. Consider how you can develop relationships with colleagues — those who do creative work similar to yours. Connect with these people regularly, once per week of possible.

• Develop a literacy of the marketplace and who your audience is. If you can’t answer these questions, you have work to do:
  1. “Someone who would love my book (or creative work) already loves theses three books: ____, ____, and ____.”
  2. “My ideal reader loves this person: ______ and reads everything they write, would see them speak in a heartbeat, and really respects their opinion.”
  3. “Where to find my ideal reader? This conference or event: ________, and this online blog/community: ___________.”
  4. “What resonates with my ideal reader? What gets them to stop and take notice? This: ________.”
  5. “What repels my reader? What gets them fired up? This: _________.”
• Start building creative habits and audience building habits. If you want to be a professional, then you have to develop habits as a professional would. You should up every day for your craft in some way. For instance, I am working on a new book, but I didn’t have time this morning to really devote to it because I had to write this 1,800 word post that you are reading. Yet, when I arrive at Starbucks at 5:30am, the first thing I did was open up Scrivener to work on my book for a solid 15 minutes. Then I closed it and moved on to this post. Each day I am sharing a photo of myself on Instagram working on my book, simply as a way to ensure I stick to this habit. Every day: create.

  Likewise, the best way to consider who your ideal audience is and how to connect with them is to do so each day via a series of small habits. Ask yourself: “How can I have a tiny interaction each week with someone who loves the kids of books that I write?” No, you are not promoting your work, you are simply seeking to understand one new thing about these readers.

How can you attend to your craft and those who you hope to connect with your work each week?

Thanks.
-Dan

In March I released my first book, and in April, my wife gave birth to a baby boy. Amidst this change, I have been considering if everything I do lives up to my mission of helping writers and creative professionals. So I began working with Teri on my team to analyze why people hire me. In our analysis, we came up with three key areas where people tend to need assistance:

1. “I need clarity in my creative work to go from a wannabe to a doer who knows exactly how to become the writer I have always dreamed of.”
2. “I have no idea who my ideal audience is, how to find them, or how to leverage social media to do so.”
3. “I’m preparing to launch a book, and I’m terrified that I’m not going to get it right. I don’t want to miss my big chance, I have worked so hard for this.”

In response to this, we have been optimizing my consulting process in these three areas. Today I’m launching new packages that addresses each challenge above. If any of this speaks to you, and you have considered working with me to get it done, learn more about my consulting packages here.

I realize that many of you may resonate with the challenges listed above, but are not at the point of wanting to work with me. So I wanted to share some advice for how you can begin moving in the right direction. Let’s dig in:

“Dan, I Need Creative Clarity!”
If you have a lot of creative ideas, but struggle to find the time, energy, or focus to really pursue them, I would recommend you do the following:

1. Do the Clarity Cards exercise in my book on pages 36-39. In fact, since I want this advice to be free, just email me asking for this, and I will email you a PDF of those pages so that you can do the exercise without even buying the book. The goal here is to make clear choices about what matters most to you. To state it unconditionally and see it in black and white. If you do this, send me a photo of your Clarity Cards.
2. Then, identify the single habit you need to establish that will lead you to honoring your biggest priorities. Again and again when I speak to a successful writer or creative professional, what I find is that they get the basics right. Meaning: there is no hack for getting your butt in the chair each day to write. Yes, they are inventive as to how they do this while balancing the rest of life, but the core habits you establish are the secret to whether you will succeed or fail. When you identify the linchpin habit, email that to me too.

“Dan, how do I figure out who my audience is? And how do I reach them? How can I finally figure out how to use social media to do so?
The first thing I would encourage here is to not look to social media as some magic pill that is the only way to deliver you an audience. In fact, I would encourage you to begin this process via more traditional channels:

1. Identify five comparable books, or work that is comparable to yours if you aren’t a writer. They have to be published in the last 3 years, and your book would be shelved next to them in Barnes & Noble, or a librarian would shelve them next to these books. These books should have at least 20 reviews on Amazon.
2. Now, obsess about the reviews. Read everyone of them, and understand why someone liked that book.
3. Email the author. Tell them you admire their work, are seeking similar success, and ask if you can talk to them for 15 minutes via phone for advice.
4. Okay, now we can move over to social media: follow these authors on social media, and pay particular attention to who follows these authors.
5. See if you can identify one fan of this author that you can talk to; because THIS is an ideal fan for your writing as well. No, don’t pitch them. Instead, be intensely curious about what they read and why.

Here, you are studying the ecosystem that will surround your book. Spend time learning about readers instead of pitching your book.

“Dan, I’m preparing to launch my book. What are three things you would advise me to do?”
Do this:

1. PANIC! Oh, wait. I mean: don’t panic. This is where I think having colleagues as a writer can really help. When you have friends you can call who have published in the past, you learn what to expect; you learn when to freak out, and when not to; you learn what to not be surprised by; you have someone to call at 3am when you are having a panic attack. I mean… not to make a book launch sound so terrifying, I’m just saying that not being alone will help you manage the many questions and feelings you will have around it. So this advice is: BUILD A TEAM and HAVE COLLEAGUES. Going it alone is a sure path to failure.
2. Collect your base. Too many writers imagine their “audience” as these distant people who they have never met. Yet, for most successful authors, they begin with the people around them. Sure, at first that is friends and family, but as you gain momentum, what many writers find is that anyone they meet is a potential reader. NO, that doesn’t mean you are pitching people left and right. What I mean is: gather the people who already know and love you and your work so that you can best reach them, and get them to kickstart word of mouth marketing. If you publish with a big publisher, they will send you an author questionnaire that asks you about every club you belonged to, committee you served on, school you attended, company you worked for, and so on. So, give yourself your own author questionnaire. Then create a newsletter or similar mechanism to be able to reach and engage these people.
3. Get the basics right. I can’t even tell you how many authors sit around wondering why no one is buying there book, and in the meantime, there are egregious errors on their Amazon page, the book is missing from other big retailers, their name and book title are not findable on Google, and their entire marketing plan can be summed up in them quietly waiting for the world to discover them. Instead…. consider the many paths that will lead someone to your book, especially word of mouth marketing. Then, ensure there aren’t roadblocks along that path.

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As you navigate all of this for yourself, let me know if you want a partner in the process. Details on my consulting packages can be found here.

Thanks!
-Dan

The wonderful Jane Friedman shared a link to a blog post the other week that was really impressive in providing the step-by-step process of how they successfully launched a book. This is the post:

Exactly how I self-published my book, sold 180,000 copies, and nearly doubled my revenue, which was written by Michael Bungay Stanier.

The post is 7,000 words. Go ahead and read it. I’ll wait.

Okay, welcome back! It’s a great post, right? There was so many wonderful things in it, and I wanted to dig into a few of them. The following things jumped out in reading about his book launch:

The Foundation for Success Takes Years to Develop

When Michael mentioned the getting endorsements for his book, I was astounded by the names he shared:

“I… reached out to some Big Names. Brené Brown. David Allen. Bob Sutton. Dan Pink. What I had going in my favor is that these are all people I’ve been in touch with for at least five years. I’ve had them on my podcast to help them promote their own books. I’ve found a way to meet them when we’ve been in the same city at the same time. In short, I’ve been able to be a champion for them in my own small way. So I was able to ask for a favor in return, to which they were all gracious enough to say yes.”

This is a “small detail” that is HUGE. How on earth did he get these people to provide blurbs? Oh, a podcast. Hmmmm, let’s look into that…

Yep, Michael has had a (mostly) weekly podcast for years called The Great Work podcast. I had to dig a little to find out how long he has been doing this — since 2009!

Scrolling through the list of people he has interviewed on the podcast, there are so many authors, so many recognizable names. For years and years, Michael has been forging relationships and giving back to those who would eventually provide endorsements for his own books.

This cannot be overlooked, the sheer number of years of hard work that paved the way for the success of his most recent book. Nowadays, it seems that everyone is launching a podcast, but here was Michael doing it for 8 long years, laying the groundwork.

Success begets success. He invested in his podcast and in forging relationships for years, which laid the groundwork for the success of his books. But…

Success Doesn’t Guarantee More Success

Michael’s first book had been published in 2010, and it did really well, selling 90,000 copies. But he couldn’t make a deal with his agent or publisher on his next book:

“The next three years were spent in back-and-forth between me, the agent, and my publisher, and I failed to make any progress. I wrote proposals. The agent turned them down. I wrote more proposals. The agent and the publisher turned them down. I wrote entire books. My editor told me they “loved them” but didn’t “love them.”… Honestly, the rejection left me feeling pretty bruised. I’d proven myself as an author who could write a good book and sell it, but it turns out that wasn’t enough.”

Many writers I speak to are trying to make it to a “next level,” which is always just a step above where they are now. They seek the validation of getting an agent or a publisher; of finishing and publishing their book; of launching it and selling a certain number of copies, of receiving positive reviews.

The hope behind reaching a “next level” is that once you reach it, you remain there. What Michael’s experience illustrates is that too often, with each new project, you have to work just as hard as you did in the beginning.

To be a writer is to put yourself out there, and face the risk that is involved in seeking to create something. But that isn’t easy.

You Have to Invest

Michael decided to self-publish his next book, and decided up front that he would spend at least $20,000 to do so. He hired Seth Godin’s editor. He hired an award-winning cover designer, and still rejected the first 20 designs that were presented.

I would say that any author has to invest in their book in these four categories:

• MONEY. This is the one we tend to obsess about most, even though it is no more important than the other three in this list. Regardless of your publishing path, each decision you make will have financial implications. If you invest zero dollars and sign a deal with a big publisher, you have just signed away rights to your creative work. That is a financial transaction, even if you don’t see any money leaving your bank account.
• TIME. After money, this is the one people tend to obsess about next. Again, it is no more important than the others. When you choose your publishing path, you are trading in time as much as anything else. Michael talks about the three years he wasted trying to please an agent and publisher, before deciding to self-publish is 2nd book.
• ENERGY. This is the one I obsess about most. Where do you put your creative energy each day, each week, each month, each year?
• COLLABORATION. This is the one that scares people a lot of people. Many people I know would define themselves as introverts; they are driven by social fears that have barely evolved since high school. None of us wants to be the odd man out; none of us want to seek out social rejection; none of us feel comfortable showing vulnerability. But the success you seek requires collaboration. I always think about this John Green video when I consider how the work of an author is one of collaboration, not solitude.

Seek Quality, Not Quantity

This jumped out at me: Michael said his criteria for writing his book was to “be the shortest book I could write that would still be useful. It’s 26,000 words.” He even hired a research assistant to find stories to share in the book.

When I wrote Be the Gateway, I had an initial goal of 40,000 words, and it ended up being around 45,000. Even then, I was still kind of self-conscious that it looked barely long enough to be considered a “proper book.” When the first print proofs arrived, I was terrified that I would open the box and find that it felt merely like a pamphlet, not a book.

Yet, here is Michael selling 200,000 copies of his latest book, and has more than 500 amazing reviews on Amazon. And it’s 26,000 words.

I just shows that if your work resonates with people, that other “standard practices” simply don’t matter. Quality over quantity.

There is so much else in Michael’s post that resonates with advice I share with authors:

• Play the long game and commit to a year (I tend to work with authors a full-year before the publication date of their book.)
• Build a team (here and here)
• Do the research everyone else skips with comps (here)
• Challenge “best practices” (He did pre-order bonuses, and found it didn’t work for him. This is an entire chapter of my book, but here is an older post from 2010.)

Thank you Michael for sharing such an amazing look into your process. And if all of you folks want even more in-the-trenches insights from a successful author, check out Chuck Wendig’s post, “What I’ve Learned After 5 Years and 20 Books: 25 Lessons.”

Thanks!
-Dan

Last week, I talked about how pursuing your creative work can sometimes feel full of risk, and other times full of hope. I received a lot of lovely replies to that post, but one note really stood out. It is from a woman who was replying to a prompt from me: what is your biggest challenge? Her answer:

Fear of failure. My fear holds me hostage, and whispers in my ear every excuse I ever needed to continue sitting on my hands. It says:

What if I can’t finish my story? What if I can’t do it justice? What if I complete it to the best of my ability and can’t get it published? What if I fail?

I want to act. I know I’m ready. But how do I silence my fears?

This resonated deeply with me. Because, like anyone who has done creative work, I have felt these things. And because thousands of creative professionals I have spoken to or worked with have shared them as well.

The advice I shared with the woman who emailed me is this: don’t silence the fears. Accept them. They will always be there, always whispering in your ear. Instead, focus on proceeding ahead, one step at a time, even with the whispers there.

I encouraged her to try to loosen the strangle hold they have by reading about the stories of others who have done creative work that she respects. For me, these would be books such as The Art of Asking by Amanda Palmer, Creativity, Inc. by Ed Catmul, and Still Writing by Dani Shapiro. In other words: seek out the behind the scenes reality that is often masked by public success.

All great artists deal with fear day in and day out.

When they become successful, the whispers don’t go away; in fact, the more successful you are, the louder and more pervasive those whispers may become.

I’ll end this post in a super-nerdy way to illustrate the point. Did you see the first Avengers movie? They hold this tension throughout the entire movie that if Bruce Banner gets angry, he will turn into the Hulk. So everyone tries to keep Bruce calm. Because the Hulk is simply uncontrollable. The Hulk is a destroyer, and can’t help but hurt everything around him, even those he cares about.

Near the big climax at the end (spoiler alert), Bruce is a split second away before having to fight off this monstrous alien, and Captain America looks at him and says, “Dr. Banner, now might be a really good time for you to get angry.”

Bruce turns around slowly, the alien now a few feet away, and he says, “That’s my secret, I’m always angry.”

In other words: instead of running away from the thing that Bruce fears the most, that is most uncontrollable: his own anger which turns him into the Hulk, he instead accepts it. He lives in anger because that is the only way to live WITH anger. In doing so, he has removed its stigma; he isn’t afraid of the anger, and doesn’t walk around on pins and needles trying to fend it off.

Like many of us, Bruce can’t control the hand he has been dealt. Most people manage their own personal issues with mental health, physical health, relationships, and yes, fear. For Bruce, he can’t control that he is forced to live with the duality of being Bruce Banner AND the Hulk. So he accepts it, and works with it. He accepts who he is. (here is the YouTube clip if you want to see this with dramatic music.)

I encourage you to do the same with any fear that holds you back.

Thanks.
-Dan