Category: Uncategorized

I realized something this week:

• 10 years ago, I joined Twitter. I’ve shared 25,000 Tweets in that time.
• 12 years ago I created my blog. I clicked “publish” on a post more than 2,000 times.
• 13 years ago I sent my first email newsletter. I’ve sent more than 650 weekly newsletters since then.

In some ways, these numbers are astounding to me. So much time. So many moments shared.

But they also help explain what so many writers and artists have expressed to me recently: they are overwhelmed with social media. They feel so much pressure to share and engage. When they try, they can’t seem to find an elegant way to manage all of the content and status updates being thrust at them.

At the same time, they look to social media as a hopeful way to share their creative work and develop an audience for it. Which is why last Fall, I shared this post: Can You Have a Platform Without Social Media? Yes.

An author I know shared something incredible with me this week. You see, she just published her novel, and in the Acknowledgements section she highlighted all the people that she met through me. Look how many there are!

Each of these 25+ people helped her on her journey with this book, so much so that she mentioned them by name. The author is Teri Case, and her book is Tiger Drive. Teri’s reflections on this:

“I think that’s pretty telling about the power of collaboration. I mean these are people who played an active role in helping me reach publication. It’s crazy.”

She met each of these people in one of my mastermind groups or workshops. In other words: when people collaborate in a smaller group, they make stronger connections.

What I love is that none of this is about “social media tricks and trends.” It is 100% about showing up, collaborating, and caring. It is about focusing on the quality of connection with others, not the quantity.

One of the people that Teri mentioned, author Cathey Nickell, emailed me last week:

“I don’t know if your intention is to help people “make online friends” with other writers, but that’s a wonderful result, in my mind. Without your Mastermind, I would have never “met” Teri Case, Lisa , Brian, Rupert … all those folks. I really appreciate what you’ve done so much.”

“You helped me discover my passion even more than before. I already knew that I wanted to write, and that I loved to write … I mean, I already WAS a writer! But, your Mastermind helped me discover that what was important to me was important to so many others. We bonded. We became online friends. We learned to reach out and help each other.”

If you are experiencing social media overwhelm, I would like to share some advice on how to cure it. I will keep two goals in mind:

• You want to share your creative work and develop an audience for it.
• But you want to do this in a way that feels genuine and filled with meaningful connections to other people, not a rush for “followers.”

The overarching theme here is to make your CRAFT central to how you share and engage with social media. To give this context, I will include some examples from artists and writers I have interviewed on my podcast:

Cure #1: Collaborate

What collaborating means is to reach out to someone and in some way, work together. Maybe you play a small role in something they are creating. Maybe vice versa. Maybe you do a small short-term project. Maybe you create a brand new project together.

Want to know what this looks like? Go to Rebecca Green’s blog and keep scrolling. Scroll all the way back. I did this when I was preparing for my interview with her… the blog just kept going. There just kept being more collaborations and ways that she connected her work to other human beings. It was astounding. For instance, this mural project from 2015. Even now, she works every day in a co-working space that she helped to create called The Warren. So even when working on her own projects, she does so amidst other artists. Collaborations are as easy as just saying, “Hey, I have a question…”

A collaboration can be a side project. I’ve written about the local event that I co-founded called The Madison Storytellers Festival. You can see photos and a write-up from the last one here. This was a side-project, just a fun idea that was separate from the primary creative work I do each day. What that means is that a collaboration can be something new and fun and scary, even if you have few real credentials for it.

You can also do a completely different kind of collaboration, something that is less of an event, and more of a long-term project like the Mom Writes podcast. Here Jennie Nash, Abby Matthews, and Melanie Parish forged a unique collaboration that has shared 30+ podcast episodes since last Fall.

Collaborations can be huge or they can be tiny. What I have found is that when you connect your creative vision with others, an amazing potential is created.

If you look at these examples, these are deep collaborations where friendships are forged and some pretty amazing things are created. It is the complete opposite of trying to answer the question, “How do I get more followers?” What is so obvious is that these collaborations have lead to what we all dream of: creativity, relationships, fulfillment, and creating meaningful experiences around our creative work.

Cure #2: Start (and Finish) a Project

If you are frustrated with social media, unsure what to share that feels meaningful, I suggest you start a creative project. That you share the process of that project on social media. That you finish that project.

What project? ANY PROJECT. Anything creative. Anything that aligns with your creative vision. Anything that you can create within a timeframe… let’s say 30 days. It could be shorter. It could be a bit-longer. But make it something that is achievable.

The master of this is Elise Blaha Cripe. (I interviewed her last year, check it out here.) Seriously, go to her blog and then keep scrolling back. You will see project after project from idea to execution. If you want more, I highly recommend you follower her on Instagram, and pay particular attention to her “Stories” feed, where she gives near-daily updates on the projects she is working on. The way she identifies a new project, plans it, breaks it down, and completes it is inspiring.

When I interviewed Tina Roth Eisenberg, she said this of projects:

“I realized that these small side projects light me up — they make me incredibly happy. With my blog making some income through advertising, I could take the risk to not have clients and see what happens. To help grow the side projects. The luxury of giving yourself time to create something else, or to see what it is you want to be doing.”

You can also think of projects in different ways. Here are two videos from two different illustrators making similar points from different angles:

• “Make Projects Instead of Portfolios!” by Will Terry
• “You Need a Product not a Project” by Jake Parker

I interviewed Jake last year, and I’m actually interviewing Will today.

There is a common theme in much of this advice: how important it is to finish something and share it. What I love about the examples from these creators is that not everything needs to be the length of a novel. There are many ways to create small projects that you can share, and make that the foundation for how you consider using social media. Again, make it center around your CRAFT first.

Cure #3: Ask for Help

Many of you may be saying, “But Dan, I don’t know where to begin. I don’t know what to create. I don’t have any connections to other writers or artists. I feel like I’m dangling out here by myself.”

I have a simple cure for that: ask for help.

Seriously.

That tends to scare most people. So I would encourage you to begin by reading Amanda Palmer’s book: The Art of Asking: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Let People Help.

If you don’t know anyone, then simply email people who you admire. I do this ALL THE TIME. It is literally the foundation for my podcast. I emailed the people I mentioned above and asked if I could interview them. Then I asked them everything I was curious about.

This is what many others do. I recently shared my conversation with Srini Rao. In his podcast, Unmistakable Creative, he has interviewed more than 600 people. These are deep conversations. These are real connections. This is the opposite of social media overwhelm. It is a conversation between two people.

As I look back on more than a decade of sharing on social media, my blog, newsletter, and podcast, I do not have a sense of social media overwhelm. Because it isn’t the number of Tweets I really remember. It is the people I met along the way. Those, like the names above, who inspired me. Who made my creative work and my life feel richer in the process.

I would love for you to consider: what is one thing you can do this week to connect with another writer or artist in a meaningful way?

Thanks.
-Dan

Join me a for a one-day intensive workshop to create or refine your online identity so that it feels authentically you, and will resonate with those you hope to engage.

In this one-day live virtual workshop, you will work directly with me and a small group of writers and artists to craft your online identity, including:

• Craft your mission statement: The single sentence that perfectly encapsulates what you create and why.
• Write your bio: Compose a professional bio that talks more deeply about your work, your background and credentials, and is infused with your personality in a way that is honest and professional.
• Create the elements of your social media profile: Pull this together to create the key elements of a social media profile that is genuinely you.

I will share the methodology I have used to do this with hundreds of writers and artists, providing an easy step-by-step process. I will share examples of what works and why, and will provide direct feedback to you so that you know you are on the right track. This video tells you what to expect:

 

How this works

This is a virtual workshop — you can do this from wherever you are. The live workshop takes place on Thursday February 22. On that day, I invite you into my studio:

• 10am – 11am ET: You join me and a small group of other writers and artists on a live video/audio chat. I answer your questions, do live audits of existing social media profiles, and give you an assignment. We will use a tool called Zoom to chat, you can access this via your computer or phone.
• 11am – 2pm ET: You work on an assignment and stay connected with me and the group to get questions answered and stay accountable. We will use a private Slack group for this, using text to stay connected during this time of day. You can access Slack via your computer or phone as well.
• 2pm – 4pm ET: I will schedule a 10 minute one-on-one coaching session with you to review your work and answer your questions. During this two-hour period, you will be able to listen in to my coaching sessions with others in the group. You will learn as much from listening to other peoples’ critique as to your own.
• Friday/Saturday/Sunday (Feb 23/24/25): You will continue to have access to the Slack room to share progress with other writers and artists in the group.

By the end of the day, you will have a completed mission statement, bio and key elements to a social media profile that feels natural and authentic to you and your creative work.

Prior to the February 22nd, you will receive:

• A video lecture from me where I share all you need to know so that Studio Time is about engaging with me and other writers and artists in the group.
• Pre-work to ensure you are 100% prepared to make real progress during Studio Time.
• Access to our private Slack group so that you are ready to go the moment Studio Time begins.

Price: $99. There are 15 spots available. Register now:

A writer I know shared a story with me recently that I can’t stop thinking about. It encapsulated so much of how writers struggle to truly share their work with the world, and find their audience. What she told me:

“I went to a dinner this week with a group of my husband’s friends, people I’ve never met before. During introductions, one of the men mentioned that his wife (sitting across from me) was a writer. When I had a chance I went over to her, introduced myself, and asked about her writing.”

“She immediately wanted to know why I was interested. Which threw me. I told her because I write, and I believe in supporting writers. I kept thinking, “She doesn’t believe someone is interested in her writing.” So I asked her again, what she was writing.”

“She blinked, hesitated, and was uncertain in her explanation of her books. It reminded me of how isolated writers are, and how worried we can be about what we’re doing. We chatted for a few minutes, and she thanked me. She was thrilled someone had noticed her and paid attention.”

This story was fascinating to me, because it was a reminder that even once someone publishes multiple books, they may be uncertain about their identity as a writer, and how to best communicate their work to others.

When I considered how this writer can feel more comfortable, I thought of how we connect with each other on a one-to-one level.

In 2014, I wrote a post called “Truly Embracing Your Audience,” that featured this photo of musician and artist Amanda Palmer looking into the eyes of a fan:

In that post, I concluded:

Writers and other creative professionals are often overwhelmed with ideas for how to connect their work to the world. They may look for “marketing tactics that scale,” such as publicity, social media, getting reviews, blog tours, book tours, strategic partnerships, events, giveaways, bestseller lists, awards, and so much more.

Now, these things are good, and I work with authors every day on many of them. But I never lose sight of the goal: that real human connection between a writer and a reader, via their work. And that the 1:1 connection creates a powerful effect in the world.

There is so much value in simply — TRULY — seeing those around you. Whenever I look at an author or artist who seems to have an amazing connection with their audience, it is because they are good at engaging with other people on a one-to-one level. Many of these people would consider themselves introverts too, meaning they wouldn’t do well with large groups. So they default to what they know best: honoring the connection between two people.

Which brings me to my friend Carmen.

Each morning I go to Starbucks to write and attend to the work I do for my clients and members of my mastermind. Because I sit in the same spot every morning, people tend to notice me after awhile. I’ve made a lot of great friends simply by sitting at the same table every day.

One of those people I met is named Carmen. Every day, this is what happens,

1. Carmen walks in the door, and from about 20 feet away, looks me directly in the eye and says good morning. He gets his coffee from the bar, then walks over to the milk/sugar station near me.
2. Then he squares himself to me. Meaning, he fully faces me, and gives me 100% of his attention.
3. He asks how I’m doing, what’s going on. Some days, the conversation lasts 5 seconds, other days he will sit down and we chat for awhile, with one of us telling a story or exploring a topic. Regardless of the day, he is always ready to settle in to chat.
4. When he leaves, he turns around, looks me directly in the eye, and says, “Have a great day.”

It’s hard to describe, but when Carmen looks at you, you feel his complete attention. This is Carmen:

Now, there is no reason that Carmen should be taking this time to engage with me each day. This guy is BUSY. He runs three — YES THREE — businesses locally. Each of them has their own space a few miles apart. These aren’t virtual businesses, each has hundreds or thousands of square feet of space.

He has 50 people on staff that he is responsible for. Oh, and he has three young kids.

It is clear that Carmen knows A LOT of people. There is always someone who is saying hello to him when he stops into Starbucks.

Again, there isn’t any reason in the universe that this guy should have a moment of time for me. Yet, every day, he is 100% present with me.

I asked him about this — his ability to just be present with whoever he is talking to, and his immediate response was, “it was all my father.”

I asked what he meant, and he told me how he grew up in this town, and how his dad was a local coach. He learned from his father that you don’t dismiss people. He said, “That’s huge for me. If I brought my 8 year old son in here, he would look you right in the eye, shake your hand, and ask you how you are doing.”

It reminded me: people just want to be noticed.

Every day, I see writers and artists vying to get attention for their work by leveraging the “newest social media tool.” I want you to skip that. Instead, I encourage you to truly see those around you. To be present with them. And to give them the gift of your full attention.

Thank you.
-Dan

Many writers and artists I know are stuck between these two places:

• They are overwhelmed with all of the marketing, promotion, and content being thrown at them via email, blogs, podcasts, social media, phone, TV and every other channel.
• Yet, they desperately want to grow and engage an audience for their own creative work, usually via these same channels.

It made me consider how one truly creates a magical moment for others, and in doing so creates deep engagement, word of mouth marketing, and lifelong fans.

Which brings me to this sandwich:

You see, my dad drove 100 miles yesterday just to eat this sandwich. I mean, look how happy he is with his sandwich:

Why did he do this? Well, it’s a tongue sandwich (I know, totally gross), and evidently, it’s hard to find good tongue. So he drove up from Delaware with my brother to Harold’s Deli. Now, at Harold’s, everything is huge. Here are the three of us splitting a “single slice” of cake. Look at the size of this thing:

But the size of the food is not the most striking thing about Harold’s. It’s how friendly everyone is. At Harold’s you talk to all the people eating around you, because everyone treats going to Harold’s like an event.

Why does this happen? This guy:

That’s Harold Jaffe, the owner. I overheard him say he has been doing this for more than 55 years, and a quick Google search shows that he started out at the legendary Carnegie Deli in New York City. As I sat eating my lunch on a random Thursday, he’s working the front counter, still on his feet all day, welcoming people to his restaurant.

What’s most amazing to me is that this place is as hard to find as you can imagine. Here it is, shoved in the back corner of a hotel parking lot, next to a huge vacant lot and across from a faceless office park:

When you pull into the parking lot, you pull into the rear of the restaurant. The first thing you see is a large area with dumpsters and their trash. You have to turn the corner, then turn another corner to finally find the entrance in the back corner:

If you challenged me to find the WORST place to open a restaurant in New Jersey, I would pick this exact location. Yet, Harold’s thrives here. My dad and brother drive 100 miles just to come here.

There are thousands of other sandwich shops in New Jersey, every single one of them has a better location than Harold’s and better prices. That sandwich my dad ordered? $32. Yet, Harold’s stands out. When I posted a photo on Facebook, plenty of friends said, “I love that place!”

For you — the writers or artist — when you look around and see a crowded marketplace, I’ll bet that you may feel discouraged. Discouraged about finding a place in the world for your writing or art. Discouraged about being found, being heard, and engaging an audience. Discouraged that you missed the boat on your creative dreams.

In those moments, I want you to remember Harold’s.

I want you to remember that even if you have the most disgusting sandwich (sorry dad), at the craziest price, in the most inconvenient location — there will still be someone willing to drive 100 miles for it, and when he arrives, he will be welcomed by strangers at every table who trade jokes and give a big smile.

That there is always the opportunity for you to choose what Harold Jaffe did: to make your mark and delight people, even if you ignore every trend and every “best practice” that you read about. That you can amaze people with your creative work using the advice of tennis legend Arthur Ashe:

“To achieve greatness: start where you are, use what you have, do what
you can.”

Thanks.
-Dan